Monday, March 31, 2008
Day 183
Today's plan was to wake up, unpack, take a pic, empty the car, go to work. Sleeping until almost 11 has turned that into wake up, take my pic, make my bed, go to work. It's terrible!
I am half way through my 365! Yippee! I'm not thinking "oh my god, I can't believe i've made it so far!" but more like "holy crap! I've taken a picture of myself every day for 6 months... I've blogged for every day for 6 months!"
It's kinda crazy!
Sunday, March 30, 2008
Day 182
Saturday, March 29, 2008
Day 181
Friday, March 28, 2008
Day 180
Day 179
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Day 177
Monday, March 24, 2008
Day 176
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Day 175
There is something terrible going on in my mouth right now. I think I have to go to a dentist. Maybe get my stupid wisdom teeth out :(
I failed at the whole not seeing him ever again. I imagined I would have. Maybe I can end up being strong enough to just resist the desire to spend time with him.
Fuck my mouth hurts.
I move in 2 days. I may end up updating this after I move. we'll see how it goes.
<3
Saturday, March 22, 2008
Day 174
So, I have worked my butt off this week to push certain people out of my thoughts. I have failed miserably. I blame God... or my Tivo. Anyway, tonight will be my test of will. Tomorrow and during the week will be easy... but tonight? If confronted with this person, I'll be hard-pressed to resist. My only consolation is that if he's doing *anything* tonight, it's probably poker. But I can do it! I can.... I think...
Also... I think I'm going to look into a website. I'm hoping the person I was talking to about it yesterday remembers.... but it'll showcase some photography. Good times. Even if I have to do it alone... I just really wanna see what I can do with this "talent" I seem to have....
Hope your day is magical :D
Friday, March 21, 2008
Day 173
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Day 172
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Day 170
Today's assignment was peace sign. How could I not join in? I flash the peace sign all the time! I'm a hippy... I really am.
There isn't too much to say today. The only thing I did yesterday was work. The only thing I'm doing today is work. I really hate working nights 'cause I feel like I can't do anything before work.. but when I work in the mornings, I can do things all evening. =/ Woe is me.
Monday, March 17, 2008
Day 169
Today is St. Patrick's Day. One year ago today I was making plans to head into Boston to visit Sun and Luke with Brian. The night before, I had written in my journal that my relationship was over and I was just going to do what I had to do to have a place to live. Brian got home from work and we talked. We went up to Boston and had some fun. We didn't let on at all that we had broken up that day. The next day, I went to Juli and Shannon's as not to be home.
In that year, I moved back in with mom, discovered photography, met J and Anthony's friend, and have felt more like myself than ever before.
That relationship was bad. Three years with a guy who just didn't give a crap. His apathy made me feel like shit about myself. He made me feel stupid and ugly. We never fought. The break-up came as a surprise to some, but not to others. We didn't fight but that just meant we had no passion. If you know me, you know that I am passionate about *everything*.
That relationship was good for me. Before that, I was a major commitment phob and now I know that I can overcome that. I know that I can live with someone without hating them, and I know that I will never ever settle. Ever.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Day 168
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Day 167
This outfit was too great not to turn into my 365. You're jealous, I know!
So, I went to the gay club. It was fun... but there were so few people I was attracted to! Though there was this one chick I wanted to like kidnap and make my own.... there were far less hot chicks there than hot guys on a normal day. 'Cause let's face it.. I'm not very discriminating!
I'm a little drunk.
ok... maybe a little more than a little...
Friday, March 14, 2008
Day 166
I'm just not as comfortable sleeping in a bed that isn't mine. I slept through the night, but actually GETTING to sleep was a challenge.. which was weird 'cause I was falling asleep when all the lights were on and J was still home... but as soon as he left for work, it was like BOOOIIIINNNNGG cannot sleep. But I prevailed. Then, of course, he stupid got home early (5 instead of 6) and woke me up. It was rather obnoxious, oh well.. at least I got him off to the airport.
And now I have 2 weeks to grow up and find the courage to never see him again.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Day 165
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Day 163
Not too much to say. I'm barely working this week simply so I can pack. So, I should probably throw on some Invader Zim and get to packing.
Happy Tuesday everyone! Two more shifts left of work! Woo. This weekend is going to be terrible!
Monday, March 10, 2008
Day 162
I have this "everything is about to change" feeling just covering every piece of my life right now. I think that J going to Japan this week is perfect for me. I was talking to Anthony and he thinks that when he gets back, I should just not contact him. I think that may be best. I kinda wish I hadn't told him I'd take him to the airport.. but it's not like I'd let him take the train anyway.
Mom sent me an inspirational email. Not about God or anything, but about my photography. She thinks I should just submit my photos all over the place so I can get a job as a photographer.. freelance or otherwise.
I would love to get paid to take pictures.
Sunday, March 9, 2008
Day 160
Oh Saturday. A good day. I ran a bunch of errands with J, then we decided we needed to get drunk. In our drunkenness, many of my questions were answered. Things went as expected.. just not as hoped. But I'm super ok with it anyway. So what does this change? Nothing really. I'm just turning off the feelings I was feeling.. which is pretty easily done, ya know?
Other than that, Anthony threw a party... that was wicked fun! Then I went back to J's for sleep... which was kinda pointless... but ended up being really good for that whole feelings thing that needs to go away.
Now, I must pack. Turns out I'm moving this week...
Day 159
I have 3 days worth of blogging to do today!!!!! So, I'll simply do it up day by day. Friday was pretty good. I went down to Newport/Jamestown/Middletown with Juli and Shannon. We were going to take pictures but the weather did not let us. We went to the Mews in Wakefield which was DELICIOUS. We tried to stop at Fort Wetherill for some pictures, but Juli and I had to pee too badly. So we headed down to Middletown to take a brewery tour at Newport Storm Brewery. Dude... this looked like some guy just set up shop in some skeevy industrial park. We drove around it and all decided that doing this with no boy around was not in our best interest! So we headed back to their house and drank some wine and talked some.
I then headed to J's for some weekending. I don't remember too much of what we did that night. Watched TV no doubt.. all I know is I actually got some sleep.... which usually doesn't happen on Fridays....
Thursday, March 6, 2008
Day 158
You may have to click the pic to see the whole thing.
I love this quote. It really resonates with me. Now, my mind works strangely, so this pic is going to make me talk about J.
Last night I was talking to Anthony and started telling a story. "I was talking to J last week," I began when I was interrupted with "you guys talk? I figured you just let him stick it in you then he went and played video games." (that's as exact of a quote as I can remember... which isn't saying much). Yes.. we talk. We talk almost ever moment we're together and awake. I absolutely love it! When I was with Brian (the boy I dated for 3 years and lived with for like 2), we never talked about anything. I think we went full days without words spoken other than "did you eat?" But J and I?? We talk so much! When I had known him for about 4 months, he would start telling me things and I'd say "I know, you told me" and he would get all huffy and say "aww man! I've told you all my stories!" A few weeks ago, it happened again. I playfully snapped and said, "dude, we talk ALL the time!" "But I only see you about once a week," he said slightly confused. "I know this! But you know what we do the entire time together?? We talk! About everything... abut nothing... just talking." And we do. And it's great.
He and I have so much in common. This, we were talking about last week. When I find something funny and try to share it with people, I am often met with a look of "wow, you're nuts" or they find it funny in a way not intended by me. But we find the same things funny or entertaining or fascinating or beautiful!
This entry is making me want to throw up a little... but i guess it had to be said. I just don't share much often. I'm over this. I need food..
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Day 156
This is probably wicked cropped. Click to see the full image.
I voted today! It was the Primaries so I had to vote for the person I felt best represented me. I was torn. I have been backing candidate #1 since 2000 but don't think this person can win in the long run. Candidate #2 is someone I would vote for in the long run and I think has a better chance of winning. I was torn. After an unbelievable amount of soul searching I decided to go with my gut. Then, I decided that I needed to go home and sleep instead. But, this caused me to feel sick, so I stopped and voted.... and I feel great about it! And I'll do it again the day after my birthday.
That's all I have to say today. I sure don't want to go to work today/tomorrow/ever again...
Monday, March 3, 2008
Day 155
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Day 154
Saturday, March 1, 2008
Day 153
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