Day 130

I would have been asleep by 10:30 had he not IMed me. I hate that I always feel like the last person in the world he wants to talk to.

But i don't want to dwell.

I have a long day ahead of me... but at least it's Thursday! Which means weekend for me.

I decided to start keeping better track of my money.. especially since things are going to start changing with the debit cards and how funds are taken out. that'll be a fun week, i'm sure...

*ahem* click ads?? :D

Day 129...

So, here is how my week goes: Sunday, I'm happy and satisfied. Monday I'm still riding on the high of the weekend. Tuesday, I'm still happy. Wednesday, I'm usually pretty indifferent and not thinking about it. Thursday, I miss it and am starting to get anxious. Friday morning I start to get angry and quit. Either Friday night or Saturday, I'm back on it and enjoying every minute of it. Then the week starts over again....

And there is your little insight into me.

I so wish my job paid more/was a little more challenging.

I had someone ask me about my relationship status. Not a fun question to answer in general let alone at 7:45 in the morning to a 25 year old in new york. I wonder if he was cute....

Day 128

I had a dream that he told me he loved me. Know what my reaction was? "Ew, why??" Even in my dreams I hate myself.

I'm so appreciative to everyone who has clicked! We have a ways to go... but I see that clicks have been made and I'm eternally grateful!

I'm very excited about tomorrow! I managed to get it off. However, I can't handle that, so I picked up some a.m. hours. So, I work at 7:45 am but I'm done for the day come 12:45. :D

I'm the most interesting person ever, huh?? Sorry that I'm not. I have a long day ahead of me. I have to leave my house 10 minutes ago and I won't be home until 10:30 tonight. I suppose I should get out of bed....

Day 127...

Still trying to generate more views/clicks. I hate whoring myself out this way.. but I'm getting a tad desperate.

I have something planned for Valentine's Day! I hate the holiday, but I think it'll make for an ok picture.. so woo! I'm working a double that day.. so.. you know... whatever.

VD is weird for me. I hate it.. I really really do.. but that doesn't mean that a girl doesn't want some kind of recognition of it. I spent 3 years in a relationship that was barely one. Last VD, I cried my eyes out.. and if you know me.. you know I don't cry. This year is weird. I don't really have anyone that I can get mad at if I don't get anything for it... but I do have someone that is either gonna say something or won't. And if I were a betting man... err woman... I'd say he won't. 'cause that's the kinda gal I am.

ugh.... just the thought of that stupid piece of crap holiday is getting me down... I should cheer up. I have an hour before I leave for work. I should nap....

Day 126

I had a super duper scary driving experience last night. It was after 1am and I'm driving along and this SUV gets behind me and is right on my ass with their brights on. So I change lanes and they change right behind me. For like 5 minutes they're following me. It was getting close to my exit and I was getting so scared... they eventually got bored or something... but it freaked me out. I was shaking for the next half hour.

Last night was great. Drinking with Anthony then drinking with Jon and his friends. You know what is a glorious glorious thing??? Denial.

day 125

As soon as I know more.. you'll know more...

click pic to see (and click ads, too!!)

Day 124

Again with the clicking to get the full effect. And click my ads so I can buy a new lens and take more pictures :) I know, I know.. I'm terrible. Butttttt... maybe if I see people clicking and know people are reading, I'll be more inclined to take more pics and divulge more thoughts/feelings.

'Cause something big happened this week.

Anyway, I could use a hug. I just wish things were easier, you know? I wish I had the confidence to just be like "DUDE!"... but alas... I don't..