Day 123

today was a big day for me. I wrote a big email to a big person.

I'm scared at how okay I feel about it.

Day 122

I woke up a little late and had to skip the gym. =/ Stupid work stealing my soul.

Day 121

I'm so tired.

I don't know how I'm going to make it.

One day, it'll be worth it.... one day..

day 120

no comment

day 119

I really do enjoy working out. I ran a bit today. Here's hoping I can get better at that. I've always wanted to be a runner. Maybe I can practice that at the gym so when the weather gets nice I can run outside.

Day 118

I wish I could hold onto this feeling forever. After an entire weekend spent with him... I just wish this feeling would not go away.

..... the feeling of annoyance and indifference.

day 117

Another picture where you need to click it to get the full effect...

My fridays are weird. I used to be sure I knew exactly how the day was gonna go. I'd go to work, then I'd go to his house afterwards. Maybe do something on Saturday, then go back. Now, after the break, I really have no idea.

I just wish things would settle.. or that the feelings would just go away.

Day 116

Arg! Life is so stressful. Stupid money... or lack thereof. Sometimes I just want to cry.

But it'll get better. I'm working on making that better.

I'm heading to the gym today. It's been a while since I've been. I'm looking forward to it, but I'm also slightly nervous. Oh well.. I'll get over it.

Day 115

I don't have much to say.. so I'm not gonna. (I say that a lot).

Tomorrow is Thursday which is really my friday which is sweet.

Day 114..

The landscape shots get cut off. You'll actually have to click the picture to get the full effect.

Speaking of clicking... I don't think anyone really reads this, but if you do.. you should go ahead and click the ads that I've placed on here. I've decided to put them here in hopes that I can earn some $ for a new lens or two.

today is the first day of school. :(

i'll leave it at that.

Day 113 .:sigh:.

I had another picture for my 365.. but given the fact that today is MLK day, I figured I'd honor his memory and the strides that he made towards equality. I was inspired by a couple of youtube videos and figured it was my duty to respect today.

Stupid said it was dumb of me not to bring PJs over since it's not like I wasn't going to stay the night. I, honestly, didn't think of it while I was rushing out the door. I suppose I should just keep a spare set of PJs in my car.

I plugged in the electric blanket last night. It was worth every second... until about 8am when I started sweating.. but I fixed that.

I have every intention of doing laundry and cleaning my room today..... let's hope I can follow through... I should probably stop blogging and start that.

Day 112

Today was REALLY cold. Anthony hurt his ankle.

I go sleep sleep. nighty.

Day 111

I'm in a pretty good mood. This morning was good. Mom is out of town so I have the house to myself. I may be going out tonight, but if I were to just stay home alone, I'd be ok with that, too :)

I'm watching Celebrity rehab.

I'll have to go ahead and write in my other journal so when I look back at this entry, I know what I'm talking about...

Day 110

What a day. I spent far too many hours watching a boy play a video game. So many hours I kept falling asleep on his couch. But at least I got dinner out of it.. and some pictures. Speaking of.. I should probably edit/upload those.

This is the blog for Friday. I didn't get home until about 9:40 this morning so I didn't get a chance to update until now. Go me.

Day 109

I could easily make every entry about him. But I'm not gonna 'cause that's stupid.

Today is my 4 year anniversary in Rhode Island. Crazy!

Today is also my Friday! Wooooo!

Mom is going out of town this weekend. Maybe I'll get drunk!

For now I have to go to work.

Day 108

I don't have a whole lot to say.

I'm tired. (I worked a double)

Boys are stupid.

I feel stupid.

Love pretty much sucks and I don't think I want to feel it anymore.

And I'm fucking hungry!!

Day 107

Today, in looking at my 365 set, I had that "oh my god" moment of "wow.. I've taken a picture of myself every day for over 3 months!" I know I kinda just started.. but it feels like it's almost over. weird, I know...

I wish I could stop thinking about him. I don't mind the occasional conversation and whatever.. but being on my mind to the extent that he is is kinda making me angry. Angry at myself and my stupid brain/heart. I, a little bit, want to throw up a little just thinking about those feelings. They make me angry and I don't want them anymore. :(

Day 106

I hate when the snow screws with my parking or my getting to work on time. I thought I was going to hate it today.. but I don't.

I do just love the snow so much!

Day 105

This will be my first Sunday at work. I hope it's not terrible.

This week may be interesting... I picked up some extra hours. It'll either breeze by.. or kill me. We shall see. I hope it's easy so i can work more and often....

Day 104

I continue my efforts to become the stupidest girl in the world.

We watched the playoff game.

I ate sushi today.

day 103

I want to take this horrible first day of period I feel and punch it in the head. Fuck you uterus!

Day 102

Everybody seems to want a piece of me. Everyone wants to spend some time with me. Well... not everyone.

I'm doing really well at work. I'm good at my job.. I know this. Sure, I need to lower my AHT, but I'm doing great with availability and surveys. Why do I bring this up? Well, this is very much a job to get me through. I like it and all... but I don't see myself doing the phone thing for very very long. Then again... I can see myself sticking with it until I need to do something else. I do like the company a lot, though... so I'd like to stay with it. I dunno.. I just feel.... overqualified... which I know I am. I need to pick up more hours.... I need money... very very badly.

Day 101

Happy Birthday to him.

I don't want to go to work today... or like ever.

And I have to pee.

See?? Interesting, right??

Day 100

I can't say "I can't believe I've made it 100 days!" The truth is.. if I made it a month, I knew I'd make it the year.

i'm out of ideas for the week, though...

Day 99

The problem with blogging every day for 366 days is that you kinda run out of things to say. Sure, I could talk about the boy situation.... but what is there to tell? Talking... touching.. laughing... name calling. I could talk about work, but that's boring. What's left? Not too much right now... and that is kinda nice.

Day 98

I saw him.

Day 97

I'm not in the mood for me today.

I saw Walk Hard. I bought Futurama season 3. Now I'm waiting to see what's up for tonight.

I'm hungry and craving buffalo chicken.

Day 96

This picture will always remind me of him.. because it is him. I'm so lame, I know. I just love sleeping with him so much. I've never been so comfortable sleeping with a guy.

He's been IMing me.

I'm getting kinda scared.

I'm stupid.

That's all I have to say about that.

Day 95

December was really difficult for me in regards to boys. Nothing has really changed, but it feels like the stress will be over soon. You ever get that feeling like your on the brink of something? Yeah.. that. Not like anything is going to happen.. but soon I just won't care.

I hate being so emo.. but emo makes for good art.

Day 94

I'm a sap. I know it.

Life sucks sometimes. I don't want to talk about it.

I'll have more to say about this topic by Sunday.

It just started to heal.... and I can feel it cracking already..

day 93

I'm friggin' tired.

My heart dropped last night at the receipt of a text message sent by him. I didn't like that feeling.